Donald And Hillary
Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton, oft seen as political foes and personal enemies, but what if they were lovers? Well, claims have recently come out that these two are in fact lovers in the night-time. A unknown twitter user reported that he saw the two, intimately engaged from the window of a hotel across from the Trump towers in New York City. @garyjohnsonismypresident was taken down from twitter by the NSA soon after this claim. But the NSA wasn’t fast enough as TMZ soon reported it. An anonymous 4chan /pol/ user put up the comment “I have noticed a large amount of physical tension between the two during the debate”. Following this comment millions of Americans watched re-runs of the presidential debate and were shocked at the way the two controversial candidates were looking at each other. Because of these claims Milena Trump announced that her husband would never do anything like that with Hillary Clinton. Bill Clinton was unavailable for comment on the issue.
The nation's reaction to this is no surprise to us as it is one of repulsion and fascination. The differing political, social, and moral views of the two make it confusing that they would be so attracted to each other. It is hard to believe but if TMZ reports it as fact we as a news organization must give it the benefit of the doubt. The most extreme reaction to this alleged affair is people denouncing their citizenship's and moving to other countries, Canada in particular. But when people arrive in Canada most are denied citizenship.
Some celebrities and political figures gave their reactions to the allegations:
Bernie Sanders “If this is true, I don’t know what can be done about it”
Mitt Romney “ This is why we need a man with good Mormon morals in the white house”
Gary Johnson “ Man I need some weed to handle this mentally”
Sarah Palin “I have seen similar things in Russia which is in my backyard:
Oprah “This is why i’m retired, I hate this country”
Vladimir Putin “ This is absolutely vile, when I heard about this abomination I had to take a long shirtless ride on my horse to ponder my thoughts.”
Kim Jon Un “ This is why my citizens are not allowed access to the internet, I am a man of safety, thinking about this makes me want to nuke my own country.”
Will Ferrell “Why are you asking me this question , I don’t care, yeah its gross so what. Stop harassing me for comment on things that happen. People shouldn’t care what I think. Im an aging actor who really isn’t that funny anymore. Get off my lawn or i'm going to call the police”.
Overall whoever you are, you are not sane if this doesn’t disturb you a little bit. Also this we are all hoping is an elaborate prank on our nation. But we don’t know for sure, and we may never know for sure.
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